Volatile avoidant validating hostile
When a situation arises that touches on a subject you disagree on with your partner, you feel high levels of stress.
While researchers maintain that as long as the couple matches in their conflict styles, most of the time the relationship can continue to be satisfying.
That way, both of you have the same expectations of how disagreements will be resolved.
About 30% of couples say that their partner has a different conflict resolution style than their own, with the actual number probably being higher than that.
You value keeping hostility outside of the relationship and communication.
Rather than valuing individuality, you thrive on the friendship and joint partnership aspect of a relationship.
The only exception to that is if both partners are Avoidant.
They are less likely to gain skills on how to manage disagreements appropriately.
This becomes a big problem when the couple has children and has to make important decisions.
Because they did not practice good communication prior to becoming parents, they are more likely than the other two conflict types to develop unhealthy relationship patterns after the children are born.
Below are the most common behaviors associated with each of the conflict management styles. Volatile You believe you and your partner are equals.